Obituaries

Thanks to my friend, Walt, an educator in Kansas, for the following obituary. We may think we are eternal, but sooner or later, we are all bound to go the way of our dear departed friend. (although some say I’m already a little stale)Pillsbury Doughboy of TV Fame ExpiresWord was received late today that veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to his many friends as Brown-n-serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player.Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out for send off (and large meal following) including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungary Jack, Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker, The Hostess Twinkies, and of course Skippy. Musical tributes were performed by Jimmie Dean.The grave side was piled high with flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing Pop N. Fresh as the man who “never knew how much he was kneaded.”Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes – conned by those who buttered him up. Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions.Pop also was a philanthropist, providing bread to the needy. He was especially noted for providing blankets for homeless pigs.Fresh is survived by his second wife, a strawberry bismark. They have two children and another bun in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.Thanks Walt, for sharing the news. And to all of you grieving Pop, please remember to shut off your ovens.