The Great Chocolate Famine
I was carefully listening to the news the other day, while dozing in my easy chair, and something startled me. It was the news about chocolate. It seems that we people in the world are eating ourselves out of chocolate. Yes, we are consuming more chocolate than we can produce. This is leading to a catastrophic worldwide chocolate famineThink of what this means. Billions of people will go without any Hershey Bars for days on end. S’mores will be something we can only tell our children about as we sit around campfires. Night time snacks will be plain milk.No chocolate donuts for a fast breakfast. No brownies, no chocolate covered peanuts, no hot-fudge sundaes. All because the world is full of over zealous chocolate consumers. Fellow earthlings, where is your self control? If ever there was a need for some sort of ecological conservation, this is it.I think though, that we can avert much of the chocolate famine’s crunch by organizing ourselves and getting a chocolate contingency plan through congress. We need a new political party, say the cocoa consensus. We need to whip up bipartisan support for a federal chocolate reserve.Perhaps we could store tons of gold foil wrapped chocolate bars under lock and key at Fort Knox. I think this is the one cause that can unite Clinton and Gingrich. I think even Rush Limbaugh will throw his weight into this.This is THE CAUSE of the new millennium.So, fellow chocolate eaters, begin to conserve. Protect the cocoa plant. Lets get some educational spots on worldwide TV with some catchy slogans.”Just don’t eat so much””Got chocolate?””No chocolate? This changes everything.”Oh, I hope they don’t start trying to come up with a synthetic chocolate. I’m sure it would taste all wrong.You know what? I’d go on with this, but I feel a little hungry. I’m thinking chocolate cream pie. I wonder if you can grow your own?