Temporarily Permanent

It seems more duct tape is sold in Springfield, Missouri, than in any other town in the United States. I guess that more things are temporarily held together by duct tape in the Midwest than anywhere else in the country. I myself have temporarily fixed a few things that are still duct taped together, including my fishing pole.But, when it works, hey – why not? Did you hear about the guy who cuts hair and decided to stuff a bunch of hair into his wife’s pantyhose to suck up spilled oil? Seems that worked. Now if he could just duct tape enough pairs of panty hose together he can clean up the next big oil spill. If he cuts enough hair.But, with all this Yankee ingenuity going around you got to be careful. Take for instance that new drug they’ve been touting in the news, Viagra, I think it’s called. It is dangerous when mixed with other drugs. I’m working on inventing my own drug. It’s an anti-annoying drug.I was wondering, if I could perfect this anti-annoying drug, you know to give to people who are annoying, would it have a bad reaction when mixed with other prescription drugs, like the ones that make you grow hair? But, there would be big money to make if I could just perfect this anti-annoying drug. My wife said she wished I would, so I could take it.She mentioned that today when we ended up eating in the smoking section. When our hostess asked us if we wanted smoking or non-smoking I said “smoking, because I don’t want to sit with a bunch of smoking nuns.”You know, if my wife could duct tape my mouth shut, that could be considered anti-annoying.

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